Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Loving and getting hurt

There are times we no longer wish to love because of unpleasant past experiences. We fear the repetition of betrayal. We do not wish to re-experience mistreatment. We dread being lied to and manipulated again. And we shudder at the prospect of being left behind and abandoned.

These sometimes painful romantic episodes that we had to live through in the past can be traumatizing. Such experiences often lead to certain beliefs about love and people in general. Unfortunately, these beliefs tend to be negative. We come to form our own biased views to the detriment of our ability to seek happiness.

But it is not the act of loving that we fear. Rather, it is the possibility of getting hurt once more that fills us with apprehension. And for as long as we dread the past, we will forever live under its shadow. Therefore, it would be wise to allow ourselves to heal first. We will know we are already healed when we feel we are ready to trust once again.  

To love is natural, which means it is human nature to do so.  And no matter how painful they may be our past experiences should not be allowed to hinder us from fulfilling the need to love and be loved.

Loving is a risk. And in every risk we take, we may experience joy or sadness, bitterness or bliss. If we will get hurt in the process, then so be it, because love, even if it hurts us, is still love.  And having loved makes us much better individuals than if we had never loved at all.  

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