Thursday, December 21, 2017

The Right to be Jealous

Falling in love comes with it certain unexpected outcomes which we sometimes fail to take into account. One of them is jealousy. This feeling hits us suddenly and without warning. It usually happens when the romantic interaction has reached a point where we have become used to the attention and affection of another individual. The constant communication, the concern, the warmth and the sweetness shown to us have somehow made us feel a degree of attachment to the person.

But for as long as there is no real commitment, jealousy has no rightful place. This is true especially during the courtship stage. Let us consider a situation where a girl is unsure whether to enter into a relationship with her suitor. She hesitates to commit yet when she sees her suitor with someone else, it tears her apart. This jealousy is misplaced. 

The experience of jealousy is a definite sign that we have already fallen in love with a person. And if we are not ready for this feeling, jealousy can often be distracting, if not maddening.

Jealousy happens. It exists and is a normal part of the romantic process. But to allow ourselves to be consumed by it often leads to conflict and misery.

The only way to inoculate ourselves from this potentially unpleasant experience is to realize that the only reason we become jealous is because we are afraid that people will leave us. And this fear comes from not being secure in ourselves and in our relationships with others. If we can overcome our insecurities then we will no longer have any reason to feel jealous.

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